Someone once told me that you must prepare to make adjustments whether something coming into your life is minor or major, good or bad. Getting a new hairdo or promoted to a new position? Unwanted stress could arise if you aren’t prepared to handle any demands of such minor or major change. Being married for over twenty-five years now, I know this to be very true. This advice has taken me a long way through many types and levels of change I’ve had to make in my life as a wife, mother, and educator, three most constant roles in my life.
A shift in order and structure can be exciting, but can also be scary. Even though you see a good thing coming, it’s uncertain how all members affected will react to the inevitable adjustments that will need to be made. Even a simple hairdo change could lead to unexpected reactions. Our oldest son needn’t say a word when he first saw my hair cut back into a short bob after over a decade of wearing it long. His eyes were very telling that he didn’t like it. Regardless of how much my husband shared my excitement on my momentous change, there was this deep pinch of stress in my heart that not all those dear to me approved, even if it was only one. That one just happened to mean the world to me.
Change can simultaneously bring good and bad stress in many factors of life. While we were celebrating just last month with a father who had recently received a promotion, we have begun to see the strain the new position was taking not only on him, but his wife and children, given the longer hours and required distance for travel daily he perhaps didn’t fully anticipate. Sometimes, the light is all we see and we become blinded in the process to get there. Still, we know that the promotion was a move up for the family.
With any change, energy is exerted. It’s fair to say that any energy exerted is one spent, not gained. I feel like my body needs a good nap whenever there is a change in endurance or strength in my workouts or an unanticipated change from my daily routines teaching. Having experienced the consequences of not preparing for change, I have learned to do so when it is in my power of control. To arrive at peace and contentment each day, the following is what I try my best to do in preparing my heart, mind, body and spirit for change: Relax. You’ve got this. What doesn’t kill you will only make you stronger, remember? Breathe. Breathe in the good. Breathe out the bad. But just keep breathing, regardless. Let go. Control what you can. Let go what you can’t. Repeat RBL.
Having failed to coach my heart, mind, body, and spirit in dealing with anticipated change has had consequences not just on me, but for those around me. And when at fault for not preparing everyone involved in the change, that responsibility of the affect can be heavy. Lighten your footsteps. RBL.
